A very long post about a sandwich

Here's the thing: our life is pretty boring. My kids aren't tiny and precocious anymore, doing adorable things like cuddling with life-size Justin Biebers or sharing a PB&J with our Great Dane (which we don't have). So I'm running out of material. I go to school. They go to school. Kolby goes to work. In between we clean the house and go to movies and run kids to activities and fold lots of laundry. And cuddle with the cats, which I could write an entire blog about. And maybe I will. Actually, no maybe about it: I'm starting one tomorrow.

But the one constant thrill in my life, besides the cats, is food. I love food, and I love feeding my family. It is always the first thing that pops into my brain when I get my new schedule for the quarter, "Oh no! How will I feed my family?" Having a healthy, yummy, hot dinner on the table has always given me a sense of happiness and accomplishment. It's primal. Or Mormon. Or both. But it courses through my blood.

So, ya'll might be getting a lot of food posts in the next few weeks because, as of tomorrow night at 11pm, I'm on break and I have time to cook/bake. And I like food. And my kids are no longer as entertaining as my preschool and toddler-aged nieces and nephews. (I wish my sister Jodi wasn't such an OCD paranoid because ya'll would die laughing at her 4 year-old's obsession with Bieber.) (And now you are wondering what her OCD paranoia has to do with Bieber Fever, aren't you? She's "gone private" which is blog speak for "you can't read my blog unless you've passed a background check and forwarded me the last three months of your internet history.")

(Any of ya'll pedderphiles who pop in to see if I've posted pics of my kids in their spanky pants can just tune out now. Not today. But you're welcome to stick around for my recipe for Italian subs.)

(And any of ya'll grammarphiles who are cringing at the improper and excessive use of parentheses and conjunctions can just find something else to read. And eat).

Sandwich Night is a longstanding tradition in our household. Our go-to weekend evening meal since around the time Mia was born is a baguette with a yummy cheese, proscuitto (fancy bacon), and roasted red peppers. We have a lot of variations on this theme, and we have more labor intensive choices. But any way you stack it (hahahaha) Sandwich Night totally rules.

Several weeks ago we went skiing and the typical ski-grub (chili-cheese fries and nachos) was not offered, much to our children's deep despair. I think the ski grub might be 70% of their motivation for skiing. So without the favorites on the menu, Kolby ordered an Italian sub, and the variation we've come up with in the weekends since has raised the Italian Sub to official King of Sandwich Night.

Behold his beauty:

Here are the simple steps.

• Go to the store.
• Buy a baguette, or some mini-baguettes. You want bread that is chewy because the exterior of typical french bread will crumble and make a mess of your shirt while you eat. And if you happen to be wearing a v-neck shirt, and you are the sort who wears a bra, your bra will be full of crumbs. Not that I know this from experience. You need chewy--almost the exterior texture of a bagel. I buy mini-baguettes.
• Go to the deli counter at your grocery store and buy sliced salami, ham, pepperoni, and provolone. I get 1/2 pound each of salami, pepperoni, and provolone, and a pound of ham. This feeds us for dinner one night and lunch the next day, with some leftover for eggs and lunches. If you haven't had salami in your scrambled eggs I am so very jealous of the new experience you have in your future. It will change your life.
• A couple more things you'll need: pepperoncinis, peppadews, and sliced black olives. The pepperoncinis you can find by the pickles. Don't be afraid to buy the whole bottle. I have another recipe in your future. The peppadews are in the deli section at my grocery store.
• Do not forget the peppadews. This is what they look like:

They are about the size of the top half of your thumb, and they take the sandwich from great to AMAZING.

• The second rule of Sandwich Night (I'm not sure what the first rule is.) DO NOT LEAVE OUT THE PEPPADEWS. Seriously, don't.
• Now go home.
• And then assemble like this (meats and cheeses only, and don't be stingy with that provolone. It's not getting any younger. Haha.):

(See that French bun on the right? In my experience with various breads, I may or may not have learned first-hand that the French Buns are much more aggressive crumbers than their French Baguette brothers.)

• Now after you've admired those beauties, wrap them up in aluminum foil and bake them at 350 for maybe 15 minutes. Or 20. Until the cheese is all melty and everything is warm. During the last 10 minutes you could even throw in a pan of kale chips to bake at the same time.
• Slice up those peppadews and set out the peppers and olives. You can snitch a few while you wait.

After they are finished getting warm and melty, pile on the peppers and olives. The kids like theirs without peppers and with warmed marinara sauce for dipping. Those of us with more sophisticated palates will not need the dipping sauce because the peppadews absolutely make the sandwich. Although now I'm kind of thinking ranch dressing could be pretty amazing as a dipping sauce too. Amazing and yet sophisticated. This is a constant work in progress.

There you go. You are so very welcome.